Dear Kay,
This morning, I tried to meditate and balance myself. I spent a lot of time thinking about you. I hope that you are okay and working through some of this in your mind. I wish that I could remind you of how much that I love you, and how beautiful you are. I saw your smile, your gorgeous hair, your beautiful face and loving eyes as I sat there thinking.
In the last few days, I have been thinking about your energy. You always bring me such peace. You are so pure, so genuine – a beautiful human being. An incredible girlfriend. An amazing big sister, daughter, friend. You are everything that the world needs more of. You are magic. I am lucky to have you in my life and I hope that I am able to love and nurture you the way that you deserve.
At the same time, I have been trying to work on myself. Today is Day 11 of therapy and each day I feel stronger. Slowing down my mind and focusing my energy on being ready for you if I am given the chance. What am I in this life if I’m not good for you and the people that we love? I feel foolish for not focusing on this before but I am motivated and determined to be consistent with this for however many years I have left.
I wish that I could tell you that I’m here. I don’t know that it would make you feel any better or that you’d be receptive to it, but I still wish that I could. I think of you every second and I see you everywhere I look around. It is all encompassing.
And I will be here. I will wait for you. You deserve that.
I love you always,
John
Leave a Reply